Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average...which means, you have met your New Year's resolution.
~ Jay Leno
Resolutions of the new year. Everybody has 'em. It's like if you didn't have any resolutions when someone asked, you'd be the odd one out. The crowd would point and stare, murmuring behind your back. They'd whisper, "Check him out. Mr. Perfect with no resolutions. Straight path to heaven he thinks he's on." Yeah, it'd be horrible.
~ Jay Leno
Resolutions of the new year. Everybody has 'em. It's like if you didn't have any resolutions when someone asked, you'd be the odd one out. The crowd would point and stare, murmuring behind your back. They'd whisper, "Check him out. Mr. Perfect with no resolutions. Straight path to heaven he thinks he's on." Yeah, it'd be horrible.
However, as cliché as they seem, resolutions are good for some things though. For a start, they make really great conversation starters especially if it's that new person you've been dying to chat up. Talk about incentive to have some resolutions at your fingertips, ain't it? (Why? So that you don't come off as a bore when your crush asks you for yours and you stammer and say you don't have any, that's why. Conversation killer.) Oh, and don't forget the creativity. That's a plus point.
Resolutions like swearing off smoking, spending more time with the family, and hitting the 1 million dollar mark, just doesn't turn heads anymore. That is unless you really are going to hit the 1 million dollar mark. Instead, resolutions like "I will stop throwing water down the top floor of our school onto people passing by", "I will not let the dog hog the pillow, growl at me from the sofa and snatch the bun off my plate", "I will change the CD in my CD player", and my personal favourite, "I will do less laundry and use more deodorant" are sure to get some attention. You can check out more resolutions at Funny New Year Resolutions.
I wonder though if nobody asked what our resolutions were every year, how many of us would actually bother resolving to do anything? Which by the way could be another resolution on its own. "I resolve to make new year's resolutions from now on." Or, on the flipside, perhaps we'd resolve not to make any instead. Like so:
Case in point.
Heh, funnily enough, I was unintentionally nudged in the same direction after reading a couple of resolution postings from fellow bloggers I follow, which left me thinking about my own and jumping onto the bandwagon.
Heh, funnily enough, I was unintentionally nudged in the same direction after reading a couple of resolution postings from fellow bloggers I follow, which left me thinking about my own and jumping onto the bandwagon.
Here's a list that I came up with after much deliberating.
1) I will sleep earlier from now on - 1am if I'm not working the next day, 11pm if I am.
2) I will drink more water - the necessary 8 glasses per day
3) I will make it a habit to read at least a half hour before bed every night.
4) I will run a marathon this year
5) I will exercise three times a week
6) I will be more patient and understanding with people
and the most challenging one of all:
7) I will keep my room neat
That's quite a list isn't it? Wish me luck. I need all the resolve to see through these resolutions of mine. Pure grit. Check back again in a year to see how they went. It'll be surprise I swear. Even to me.
Where's the creativity in my resolutions you ask? Good question. But hey! I ain't looking to chat up anybody. =)
Enjoy the New Year everyone.
With many more reasons to smile,
~K
P.S. As a treat, here are a couple more laughable resolutions to begin the new year:
